Wednesday, February 15, 2006
Long time no blog. It's been a really busy semester. Almost the end now but I'm beyond dead already. Everyone's done with their models but I've just started. Good luck to me.
I thought we were alright. I really did. But with valentines' day over everything's changed. I feel like we are just friends who are occasionally intimate with each other. Is there something wrong with me? Am I being paranoid? And, strangely, I feel even more alone than ever before. I feel like there is not one person in this world who will always be there for me when I need them. Not one. Hell, not even half.
My heart is so heavy I can't breathe properly. I know he says he loves me but words are cheap. I know I have to end it soon. Let the semester end first. I need him now. Although he is barely there.
Disillusionment is like lying on ice and trying to convince yourself it's pleasantly warm.
diagnosed of lucid psychosis
7:13 PM
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