Wednesday, November 09, 2005
Something from manda's blog: Pick 10 people (or more) from your friends list, say something anonymous to them. Don't say who it is, and don't reveal them unless they guess.
I don't exactly have ten people on my links list so I shall improvise.
1. I love you and I never want to lose you but who knows what lies in store for us. All I can do is hope that our dreams and hopes will one day be fulfilled. You make my life so much more meaningful. You can make me smile when I am sad. And you make me laugh when I am utterly depressed. Just hearing your voice in the morning bring more joy and happiness to my day. I always want to be the moon to your sun. I know you will never cheat on me or break my heart. It is just not like you to do something like that. It is because of this knowledge I have entrusted you completely with my heart. I have given it to you and received yours in return. And I will always treasure and cherish this gift which you have bestowed upon me. Every minute I spend with you is worth more than all the riches in the world.
2. You have always been there for me. And when I say always I mean ALWAYS. And somehow I feel I have not done enough to thank you. To make you feel appreciated. I guess the only way I can ever repay you is just to be there when you need me to be. And I swear I will. You know I will. But when a situation calls for your dire need for me, it can only be bad. And I don't want anything bad to ever happen to you. I just want you to be happy. I want you to find something to be happy about, or someone to be happy about. I want you to stop worrying about little things which make your palms wrinkled.
3. I try very very hard not to make you feel left out. I really really do. But I don't know whether I do not try hard enough or if the situation hopeless. I really want to rewind time when we were so close and school was so carefree. When our only distinguishable characteristic was your talking and my laughter. I hope everything will go back to being the same again. And please do not ever keep anything from me. You need to be open if you want this to work out.
4. I sometimes wish that it was orientation again. I guess we were really much closer back then. I barely ever see you in school now. But it still is so easy talking to you. And I hope it always will.
5. I guess you have no idea how you have influenced my music and dressing. I just admire everything you do, your fantastic design and photography skills, your uber cool dressing and your friendliness.
6. You seem so distant now I feel I do not know you anymore. And to think that we were once really really good friends. Yet, as much as I want to reconcile our friendship I really do think that it is hopeless. There is too great a gap to fill.
7. I miss you so much. You were so friendly and welcoming since day one. And it really amazes, until now, that we could get along together.
8. I love you, you know I do. But I just don't want to have to keep assuring you that I do. You are very needy and demanding that way. Please just KNOW that I love and stop seeking for reassurance. And when you run into any problems you know I will always help you. That is my role anyway.
9. I do wonder where you are right now and how you are doing. You left so suddenly from my life. And I remembered how you helped me through my performances. You were like this pillar of calmness and security. I friendship was so brief, it almost seems unreal. I really do hope you are doing fine now.
diagnosed of lucid psychosis
11:22 PM
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